Birthdays?!

I don’t get the hype around birthdays. I don’t.

I haven’t properly celebrated a birthday in very many years. In so many years that I cannot remember when last I did celebrate it properly.

These days you get people celebrating a birthday weekend, or a birthday month.

I don’t celebrate either of those.

All I want on the day of my birth is to be left the hell alone. No phone calls, no texts, no BBMS, etc.

Why do I need to celebrate the fact that I haven’t managed to die in my sleep for the past thirty-six years? It makes no sense to me.

I did make a slightly bigger deal of The Boss’ thirtieth. That’s only because she’s special. My own thirtieth came and went in a fanfare of no publicity at all.

However, I know that her family celebrates birthdays, and especially the round numbers get special treatment.

All of that being beside the point. Some people are now having entire birthday weekends, and birthday months. Please tell me what the fuck is up with that.

I’m hating my birthday enough to not celebrate the one day on which is happens. Now why would I want to acknowledge the weekend and/or the month?

Am I broken? Or is everyone else broken?

Hallow-never-been

I have never been to a Halloween party. I did get invited once, but it was cancelled a week before it was meant to happen. 

However, looking at other people’s pictures on Facebook and reading their accounts on Twitter got me thinking a bit, which is generally not a good thing. 

Non-Muslims generally do not celebrate Eid or Ramadan. This is mostly because Eid and Ramadan are Islamic holy days reserved for celebration by Muslims only. 

Non-Hindus also do not celebrate Diwali or any of the other Hindu holy days and festivals. This is mainly because we’re not Hindu. 

A lot of non-Christians celebrate the Christian feast days like Easter and Christmas, but only because they get some loot out of it. Personally I can do without both. I choose not to celebrate either one because I’m neither a Christian, nor am I after any loot. 

Now that I have covered that, let me get to the topic at hand: Halloween. 

A lot of people out there “celebrate” Halloween. They do it for the trick-or-treating, or they do it for the dress up parties that go along with it. Either way, they celebrate it for one reason or another, but not the true reason. 

I did some research though. Some of it came from The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Wicca and Witchcraft, some of it from the internet. From this research I had learned that Halloween is actually a Wiccan holy day called Samhain. 

According to my research “Samhain is one of the Greater Sabbats and if probably the witches’ greatest holiday... For witches, this holiday has a rather different tone than it does for the population at large. Samhain, rather than being a festival of sugar overconsumption, is a profound spiritual event. It marks the death of the Lord and also the start of a new year.” *

Since this is such an extremely holy day for Wiccans, why do the non-Wiccans think they can encroach on it? Why can Wiccans not be afforded the same respect that Muslims and Hindus get. 

It’s one of their holy days for gods’ sake. I choose not to celebrate any religion’s holy days, because to celebrate the holy day would be an acknowledgement on my part that there is some validity in their beliefs. I choose not to celebrate Christmas, because then I tacitly agree to the birth of the baby Jesus. By celebrating Easter, I agree with the whole crucifixion mess and whatever else came after that.

So, all you people that celebrated Halloween this year: You just tacitly agreed that there is some merit to Wicca and witchcraft. I guess you feel like a right bunch of chops now, don’t you? 

* The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Wicca and Witchcraft. Pg 177

More Fun Sized Opinions

Music Promoters
Music promoters sometimes suck my will to live. Really they do.

We get promised a “supergroup”. I’m hoping AC/DC. We’re getting Coldplay. Enough said on that one.

Coldplay isn’t a supergroup by any stretch of the imagination.


The Rugby World Cup
While all of South Africa is “getting behind the Boks”, I’m quietly wishing the whole thing just goes away.

I don’t support sports of any kind. Especially not the oblong ball thug game. Couldn’t be bothered.

Earlier today our president gave the team a little speech. Good thing he’s got his priorities straight. I mean, it’s not like he’s got a country to run or anything.

Ard Matthews and the National Anthem
Everyone was exceptionally hard on Ard Matthews this past week, and for fucking up the anthem.

In all honesty, how many of us know the anthem all the way through? I remember bits and pieces of the Afrikaans version from learning it in primary school.

I far prefer his work with Just Jinger. The anthem can go hang itself.

Jeans with zips and flaps and things
I tried to go buy some jean pant on a few occasions. Only to be disgusted by what I saw.

Every single pair of jeans has some additional zip. Or flaps. Or bits that button down.

Whatever happened to good old straight up and down, or bootleg jeans? I can get Levis that do that, at R250 a shot. Not bloody likely.

I want normal jeans, for R100. Max R150. Without the buttony, zippy, flappy things.

Shitty Musicians and What Makes Them Popular
I sometimes have the misfortune of listening to some real crap on the radio. I hear on that there wireless machine some really atrocious musicians.

What boggles my mind is why people support all this crap. Has people’s musical tastes degenerated that much in the past 30-odd years. It’s not really been 30-odd, even in the last 10-odd years things have taken a turn for the worse.

Do people just generally like what they’re given? Are there bigger things afoot than we know of?

If people stop supporting sub-par “musicians”, stop buying their CDs then maybe they’d go away.

Imagine a world with no Parlotones, no Nikki Minaj and no Gaga. Fucking bliss.

The Second of Some Few...

I was in good spirits this evening.

OK, I wasn’t exactly in good spirits until I got into the spirits. But such is the way of the easily stressed and the addicted. That is my story and I’m sticking to it for now.

All was fine in my little world, until one person challenged me on my drinking habits.

Yes, I am an addict. Yes, I like to get drunk. Yes, I like to drink a lot. That is the way of things.

The person that called it mentioned parents that drank and smoked and managed to kick both habits.

This person is 16 years of age. This person hasn’t lived. Living with someone that has an addiction is not the same as living with an addiction.

Living with an addiction is much, much harder.

I enjoyed my ephedrine addiction. I will admit that much.

I enjoy my cigarettes and alcohol just as much. However much nicotine is an addiction, citing someone giving up tar bars as “Someone kicking an addiction” ain’t going to fly.

I smoke 15+ cigarettes a day. And that is an average day.

On an average day I smoke 15 cigarettes. I drink at least seven cups of coffee. I might even consume a few alcoholic bevvies.

Kicking cigs is nothing in comparison to kicking any other habit. Even kicking alcohol is nothing in comparison to a once a day ephedrine habit.

The point I’m making is thus… Don’t get preachy at me because both your parents beat a cig habit. Don’t get preachy at me, about my liver no less, because one of your parents beat a booze habit.

My own grandfather was a smoker and liked a bit of the old tipple.

When you have beat your own addictions, then come and speak to me. Don’t talk to me as a bystander. Don’t talk to me as an innocent victim. In that case my lovely wife would be an innocent victim of my various addictions.

Would those addictions be that I like to consume alcoholic beverages, or that addiction be that I like to photograph things…

Be careful what you call an addiction.

Next thing I know I’d be in rehab for taking pictures of things.

I Am An Addict...

Hello. My name is Tiaan and I’m an addict.

Those have got to be the hardest words ever spoken by a person ever.

I have admitted to myself ages ago that I am an addict.

Less than five years ago I was addicted to ephedrine. To those that don’t know, ephedrine is the active ingredient in most slimming tablets. Thinz, Slenz, etc. Ephedrine is Speed. Ephedrine is Ecstacy. Luckily for some of us, those tablets aren’t available over the counter anymore.

I popped 6 of those slimming tabs every single day.

Not my proudest moment. However, those moments shaped who I am today…

Were it not for a busted cam belt and my bedroom floor, I may not have beaten the addiction.

However, beating one addiction always makes room for one more.

Since I can remember, which isn’t too long ago, I’m a bit of a drunk.

Some days I drink to just fall asleep. Some days I drink to get totally slaughtered.

99% of what I do goes up to 11. I am an addict.

I think my Mother’s known for some time that I have an addictive personality. I get addicted easily to things.

I think for her it was that I don’t like being second best at anything.

I only learned how a stove works two and a half years ago. Yet, now I have to try the most complicated recipe.

I picked up a proper camera two and a half years ago. Now that camera is what partly defines who I am.

Some of my family members only found out a few weeks ago that I am an addict. On the same night they found out I’m a religious sceptic.

However… Us addicts had one of our stalwarts pass away this week… Possible OD, although the autopsy is inconclusive.

Regardless of autopsy we know. Amy Winehouse died as she lived. Everything up to 11.

In my lifetime I have beaten one addiction. Will I ever beat my alcohol addiction? Who knows?

That is the way it is.

Should we ever breed, it is either good or bad for the child.

I will either be the best parent ever, or the most drunk.

I’m glad I never had drunken parents, which means if we ever spawn I’ll have to sober up.

Try as I might, I cannot paint all of my addictions in a positive light.

The only positive that can come out of my addictions is that I try my absolute best to be number one.

The absolute worst is that I might die young. Or rather youngish.

Hopefully, one day, I’ll sober up. Do I have a problem? Possibly. Do I care? Maybe.

That last maybe is what keeps me going.

Will I carry on getting drunk? Quite likely.

Will I eventually stop? Let’s see…

You Sir, Are a Knob…

I feel I need to paint y’all a picture. If only for the purpose of this blog post.

We live in what might be termed a “gated community”. We have security guards with booms. Not that they’re any good, but it’s a bit of a sense of security.

A few weeks ago, upon arriving home, I noticed a tent on the sidewalk. Now, you need to know there’s a wooden Wendy house type of “guardhouse”, so this puzzled me.

Then a day later I noticed the guardhouse is gone, but didn’t pay the missing guardhouse or tent too much mind.

A few days after that I was working late. That was when I noticed that the guards guarding the boom were expected to overnight in the tent.

A day later we see they’re rebuilding the guardhouse. So we reckon they’re finally getting a brick and mortar guardhouse. Brick and mortar is good for winter, so much better than a wooden Wendy house in my opinion.

A few day after that I get home and notice the boom is gone. Pay it no mind. The Boss tells me that the guards are on strike. This one time, I was not blaming them for striking.

However, the cherry on the cake was when the owner of the security company left a message for all of us residents on the board. This you can see in the picture. Apparently some “arsehole” (his words) reported him to the municipality for not having plans.

No my boy. You were reported for being a heartless bastard. You pay these guys minimum wage, yet expect them to spend an ice cold winter’s night in a TENT?!

No fucking wonder they went on strike. No fucking wonder you got reported. It wasn’t me that reported you, but I wish I did.

You sir, the owner of Firmitas Security, should be ashamed. You should spend on winter’s night in a tent. Let’s see how you feel.

You Sir, Are a Knob…

I feel I need to paint y’all a picture. If only for the purpose of this blog post.

We live in what might be termed a “gated community”. We have security guards with booms. Not that they’re any good, but it’s a bit of a sense of security.

A few weeks ago, upon arriving home, I noticed a tent on the sidewalk. Now, you need to know there’s a wooden Wendy house type of “guardhouse”, so this puzzled me.

Then a day later I noticed the guardhouse is gone, but didn’t pay the missing guardhouse or tent too much mind.

A few days after that I was working late. That was when I noticed that the guards guarding the boom were expected to overnight in the tent.

A day later we see they’re rebuilding the guardhouse. So we reckon they’re finally getting a brick and mortar guardhouse. Brick and mortar is good for winter, so much better than a wooden Wendy house in my opinion.

A few day after that I get home and notice the boom is gone. Pay it no mind. The Boss tells me that the guards are on strike. This one time, I was not blaming them for striking.

However, the cherry on the cake was when the owner of the security company left a message for all of us residents on the board. This you can see in the picture. Apparently some “arsehole” (his words) reported him to the municipality for not having plans.

No my boy. You were reported for being a heartless bastard. You pay these guys minimum wage, yet expect them to spend an ice cold winter’s night in a TENT?!

No fucking wonder they went on strike. No fucking wonder you got reported. It wasn’t me that reported you, but I wish I did.

You sir, the owner of Firmitas Security, should be ashamed. You should spend on winter’s night in a tent. Let’s see how you feel.